The babyjesuschristsuperstar on Board: filling the moral void of Clinton’s legacy

[bilmore]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
The problem with this entire debate is that we haven't had nearly enough analogies.

And litotes. We need more litotes.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by bilmore
And litotes. We need more litotes.

And stuffing. We need more stuffing. Hey, it's Thanksgiving.

[bilmore]

"Harriet Miers walks into the Senate Judiciary Committee's confirmation hearings. Arlen Specter asks her, "Ms. Miers, how would you describe your approach to interpreting the Constitution?”

Miers, visibly excited, says, “I’m glad you asked. My approach is really quite interesting. I think you’ll like it.”

“Well then,” Specter says. “Let’s hear it.”

Miers launches into an explanation: “Well, first thing I do is find a fairly quiet room with a clean desk. I put the Constitution on one side of the desk, and a Bible on the other. I then completely disrobe, as to be completely unfettered for the job at hand.”

“Uh, Ms. Miers, I’m not sure that—”

“I then take the Constitution and stick it all the way up my ass. This is fairly difficult, because I like to use a large, leather-bound version, but I’ve gotten much better at it. It’s usually just the gold-plated index tabs that hurt.”

“Ms. Miers, you realize that we’re on C-SPAN right now....”

“Then, once the Constitution is safely hidden in my rectum, I bring my cat—Oscar—into the room, and begin feeding him pages of the Bible. He mostly likes the New Testament. Of course, since the Bible I use is printed on a 15% cotton-fiber stock, Oscar can only keep it down for so long. But when he finally coughs up the Bible-laden hairball, the pages have been reduced to a fine paste that it is somehow perfectly suited for use as decorative body paint.”

“I really think we should take a break now, Ms. Miers.”

“Wait just a moment. So now that I have this kitty-puke body paint, I’m finally ready for the midget to come in.”

“Ms. Miers—”

“I’m sorry, little person. The little person takes the cat-vomit paint, and begins transcribing my thoughts on the facts of the case in longhand, backwards, using, for parchment, my glorious, naked body, and using, for a quill, his glorious—”

“Would somebody get a paramedic in here? I think Feinstein just fainted!”

“Now, while the anatomically-gifted dwarf is dotting the I’s and crossing the T’s, I take a moment to forcibly eject the Constitution from my cavity. I then beat the cat to death with it—that little fucker just ate my Bible, after all—skin his corpse, and spread it out onto the desk. I then proceed to pleasure the Sex Gnome with the Constitution, all the while rolling my body across the desk, which transfers a now-readable version of the transcription onto the spread-out cat’s fur. I then wrap myself in this fabulous cloak, borrow a quarter from my Magnificent Porn Pygmy, and flip it into the air. If it lands on heads, I donate the cloak to charity, marry the little guy, and decide for the appellant on moral grounds. If it lands on tails, I donate the Oompa Loompa to charity, have myself declared legally married to the Cat-Skin-and-Puke Blanket, and decide for the appellee on a technicality.”

At this point, Feinstein has fainted, Kennedy has had three heart attacks, and Specter looks as if he’s just vomited down his suit pants, which, in fact, he has. “That’s quite a judicial philosophy you have there, Ms. Miers,” he says. “What do you call it?”

Miers jumps up from her seat, gives a cute little wave of her hands and says:

“Originalism!”



http://wingsandvodka.blogs.com/blog/..._promised.html

[Spanky]

True Story: It has been pretty dry in California lately so often I get up in the night and put lotion on my face (I know I should get a humidifier, I just haven't gotten around to it yet). At the Gym I had an injury recently so I have also been putting Ben Gay on my shoulder. Last night I grabbed the lotion bottle and rubbed it on my face only to find out I had actually grabbed the Ben Gay.

Didn't get a lot of sleep.

[Gattigap]

Time:

• If the Repulblican Chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee wants to get a second opinion on how the war in Iraq is going, where does he turn? To the Pentagon, but not to the top brass this time. In an unusual closed-door meeting on Capitol Hill last week, Virginia's John Warner, joined by Democratic Senators Carl Levin of Michigan and Mark Dayton of Minnesota, sat across the table from 10 military officers chosen for their experience on the battlefield rather than in the political arena. Warner rounded up the battalion commanders to get at what the military calls "ground truth"--the unvarnished story of what's going on in Iraq.
  
  "We wanted the view from men who had been on the tip of the spear, and we got it," said John Ullyot, a Warner spokesman who declined to comment on what was said at the meeting but confirmed that some Capitol Hill staff members were also present. According to two sources with knowledge of the meeting, the Army and Marine officers were blunt. In contrast to the Pentagon's stock answer that there are enough troops on the ground in Iraq, the commanders said that they not only needed more manpower but also had repeatedly asked for it. Indeed, military sources told TIME that as recently as August 2005, a senior military official requested more troops but got turned down flat.

Rummy can suck it.

Happy Thanksgiving, all.

[Hank Chinaski]

GaTTI- timetable to pull out or more troops go in? I know you think Bush is fucking up, but which way?




Penske-style post!TM

[Hank Chinaski]

“[AMERICA] had become intimidated by a foolish and destructive wind that ran across the land. It was a suicidal ideology: liberalism. It taught that the greatest virtue was national self-criticism. It resulted in people hating their own great country, America. And thus a handful of well-positioned, manipulative liberal elitists were able to bring down an entire powerful country.”

I thought back to what distorted times they had been, back in late 2005. While Christians were reviled and seen by liberals as the enemy, jihadist terrorists were “understood” and their detention raised a cry in their behalf for “compassion.” Social and political energy was channeled in two directions: overwhelming concern for the highest degree of humane treatment for Islamic terrorists coupled with an all out assault against Christians wanting merely to say Merry Christmas.
.
.
“So what happened, Grandpa? How did we lose America?”

“I’ll tell you: our soldiers on the battlefield overseas were brave, but we folks at home had no guts.”



Penske-style post!TM

PS- I now believe John Gotti was able to run his empire from behind bars

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
GaTTI- timetable to pull out or more troops go in? I know you think Bush is fucking up, but which way?

Dunno. The point of my post was that Rummy hasn't lied of course, he simply listened to the one(s) on payroll who said "yep, we're fine sir!," ignored the others, and chose to say that we'ved given our commanders everything they asked for. Simple, no?

Murtha's actual plan sounded like an interesting one, in which a number of troops are moved to the periphery (so they're not a daily reminder and target) but not completely out of the theatre (so that they can move where needed and stomp out Terrorist Fuckheads where and when needed), and that there's a gradual drawdown over the next year or two. That BushCo decided to turn on a dime from SwiftBoating him to throwing rose petals at Murtha's feet suggest that they might actually be thinking in these terms too.

FWIW, your picture doesn't really paint a thousand words analyzing Murtha's strategy, instead boiling it down to a couple of dozen. Penske would be proud. If he were reading this, of course.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Gattigap
Dunno. The point of my post was that Rummy hasn't lied of course, he simply listened to the one(s) on payroll who said "yep, we're fine sir!," ignored the others, and chose to say that we'ved given our commanders everything they asked for. Simple, no?

Okay. As my inner Penske suspected, you have no opinion on what to do, you just want to criticize what those in power are doing. That actually is a skill that could move you up in the Dem party over the next few decades.

But say it this way- at first I thought we should bring troops home, then I thought we should send more there.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by bilmore
Damn, Ty. Since the run-up to the war and the beginning of the war and the war and the bloody insurgency following the war, it seems like every week you come up with some new "no, THAT"S not what we've been saying, we've always been saying _______!" The invasion was doomed, it went too fast, it's a quagmire, there would never be a vote or a constitution, the vote meant bad things, the constitution was flawed, the groups could never work together . . .

For one, I never called it a quagmire. As I recall, you put that word in my mouth, and then had to admit I hadn't used it. Or maybe you didn't admit it -- maybe you just disappeared for a while.

In that vein, please find the post where I said the invasion was doomed, or the one where I said there would never be a vote, or a constitution, or that the vote meant bad things.

I may have said the constitution was flawed. I may have said the groups could never work together. If so, I haven't exactly been proven wrong yet.

You, like Bush and Cheney, would much prefer to argue with straw men. When they do it, it's political technique. When you do, it's intellectual laziness.

[Secret_Agent_Man]

Originally posted by Spanky
I should point out that I am pretty sure that at one time Ty did admit to me that he did not think Bush lied. But he is the only one the board that has admitted it.

For the record, if I've never said something, do I have to state whether or not I think that same something is true?

OK. My posts on this subject from way back should make it clear that I've never said (and have no reason to think) that Bush actually "lied."

I accept Bilmore's long-ago characterization of his actions as a "hard sell." I view it as similar to what a succesful trial lawyer would do (especially one with a different view than I of the role of an attorney as an "officer of the court.")

One of his biggest problems in my view, but also one of his great strengths politically, is that he and his administration try to operate in perennial campaign mode.

[eta -- I do not mean by this that he makes the decisions always based on their popularity. I mean that the way they sell them, the way they treat opposition and allies, and the way they try to handle problems are, in my view, more suited to a political campaign than to the art of governing.

That is perhaps understandable, given that: (a) Bush as a campaigner is far superior to Bush as a day to day "CEO" of an administration; and (b) his domestic political team (until thsi recent unpleasantnes with Mr. Fitzgerald) has proven to be deeper and more skilled than his policy teams.]

Thank God, folks. He sure is a fuck-up, but not a liar. Say it loud and say it proud.

S_A_M

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Okay. As my inner Penske suspected, you have no opinion on what to do, you just want to criticize what those in power are doing. That actually is a skill that couold move you up in the Dem party over the next few decades.

But say it this way- at first I thought we should be troops home, then I thought we should send more there.

Okay. Flip it, Hanky-poo. Please articulate this evening your plan for troop deployments (presumably for the indefinite future), or we can safely conclude that you march in lockstep with the impressive Bush Iraq policy to date. This is a skill that will preserve your sinecure in the Bush Administration firmament, which was nice in 2004, but in 2005-6 might well be marked by your standing alone on the dance floor holding watery Heineken, as GOP Congressional candidates run for the exits.

Happy Thanksgiving and pleasant tryptophan dreams, even to you, Hank.

[dtb]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
You, like Bush and Cheney, would much prefer to argue with straw men. When they do it, it's political technique. When you do, it's intellectual laziness.

Sigh. Gosh, I've missed you.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by dtb
Sigh. Gosh, I've missed you.

I would post a biting comment that would make DTB realize that Ty is really quite trite, except I don't post here anymore.

RIP PB.

[bilmore]

Originally posted by Secret_Agent_Man
Thank God, folks. He sure is a fuck-up, but not a liar. Say it loud and say it proud.

Afghanistan is being cleaned up, and elections have been held. By all accounts, the majority of citizens there are grateful. Saddam is gone. Iraq has had elections, voted in a constitution, and is even now beginning the process of inter-party negotiation and compromise that is the hallmark of a working democracy. By all accounts, the majority of citizens are grateful. Partially as a result of the lessening of Saddam's destabilizing influences and partly because of Bush's influences, Israel and Palestine are closer to figuring out a way to live together. By all accounts, the majority of citizens are grateful. The markets are way up. Our educational systems are finally beginning to pay attention to the lowest achieving groups - something they could ignore previously because there were no metrics. Tax cuts have fueled the economy. Bolton has now pushed through the anti-Hezbollah measure where everyone before him has failed. I predict Roberts is going to be one of the all-time most popular, least partisan SC Justices in memory. N Korea is apparently backing down from its earlier position and is talking to all interested parties - something Bush insisted on and characterized as crucial. I could go on, but this paragraph is already too long.

Yes, quite the fuck-up.

What's truly fucked up is that so many of your cohorts can allow their visceral Bush-hate to make them speak so irrationally and ridiculously as to say that the current status is fucked up. I remain firmly convinced that, if Bush found a magical bean that produced enough food and clean water to end starvation as we know it, you would be here telling us that that stoopid fucking Bush should have more green vegetables and fewer proteins in the diet, and that he stole the election, and Gore or Kerry would be feeding us in a far more healthy way, and, by the way, Bush is stoopid.

(Oh, and, nice save and backpedal with the oops, okay, maybe he didn't really lie like we keep trumpeting in the theme that is the sole essence of our party. Admitting that, but then saying he's a poopy-head anyway. Strong position.

Now, pull a SS and yell "Katrina!" As long as your response is as sophisticated as his, you can go sit by him.

Oh, and, Merry Thanksgiving!